


Quiet

by salamadersaurus_rex



Series: Alex/Maggie/Lucy [9]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Panic Attack, Sensory Overload, tumblr promt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-26
Updated: 2017-04-26
Packaged: 2018-10-24 10:44:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10740108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/salamadersaurus_rex/pseuds/salamadersaurus_rex
Summary: Tumblr prompt: "Can you do a director Sanvers fic of Alex going into sensory overload/panic attack and then Maggie and Lucy help her out of it?"





	Quiet

**Author's Note:**

> Content warnings for sensory overload and a panic attack.   
> Lots of people experience these things differently, and have different methods of recovering. I've based Alex's experiences off my own, but in helping someone through a panic attack always refer to the individual.   
> Thanks for the prompt!

The radio isn’t tuned right for her favourite radio station. The seven o’clock news sounds like it’s coming into her left ear through cotton wool, except the right’s fine so when the toaster pops it’s like a gunshot, lancing through her eardrum and down into her throat. It jabs at the hinge of her jaw, forcing it open and the charcoal smell of the toast she’s accidentally put on for too long worms its way to the back of her throat.

There’s been an alien attack in some far corner of the city. She should be there but she can’t force her head from its angled position because there’s static blurring in her left ear canal and the right’s been cleaned out by the gunshot toaster, and her brain’s bracketed between the two. Her breakfast’s cremated, she can see the smoke roll in little waves from the pockets of burnt crumbs, and out the bonfire-stained corner of her eye her phone lights up in that second before it starts ringing.

The heavy buzz sends her to her knees, static in both ears layered like thick cream over the vibrations of her phone. She presses her lips together to stop them buzzing in time with her phone, tucks her knees under her chin and scoots back under the table. She drops her head, lets the curtain of her hair mask the sounds cottonballing round each other and bulging loud and wide into her brain.

Maggie knows not to say anything when she finds Alex balled under the table. She swipes the phone from the wooden table top, drowning the vibrations in her palm. Lucy’s a second behind her, turning the radio off at the wall and unlocking her phone.

Winn made them an app, a simple, dimmed interface with a soft, green background and an enlarged keyboard. Maggie’s already at Alex’s side, not touching her but in her eyeline. Lucy sits cross-legged in front of Alex, holds out her phone with the app open. Alex doesn’t move for a few moments, knuckles white where she’s caught the material of her sweatpants tight between her fingers, trembling.

Maggie and Lucy wait patiently, until Alex reaches out and takes the phone gently. Types with one thumb, lips still pressed together tightly.

_Toast._

She turns the phone round for Maggie to read and Maggie gets up, plucks two slices of cremated toast from the toaster and flips open the bin, tosses them in and firmly closes the lid again. Lucy gestures to Alex for the phone.

_Window?_

Alex lifts her head slightly.

_Only a bit._

Maggie sits back down and Lucy stands up, every movement slow and deliberate to let Alex take it in. Lucy makes her way to the kitchen window and cracks it open to let in a flow of fresh air, the rumble of early morning traffic muted by the double glazing.

Alex hands her the phone when she gets back. Lucy's brought Alex’s hoodie with her that was draped over the back of the couch. She reads the short conversation between Alex and Maggie as Maggie, quietly, asks Alex if she wants the hoodie.

_What do you need?_

_Quiet  
Still unravelling._

After her first panic attack Alex had sat with a DEO therapist. She’s breathing the same way had been suggested to her, letting the ball of sound Lucy and Maggie know is all knotted up behind her eardrums untease itself. She lets out a long breath and takes the hoodie carefully from Maggie, puts the hood over her head like a kid using the coat as a cape.

She parts her lips. “Phone.”

Lucy hands it to her.

_Want to sit here for a bit._

She shows them both but doesn’t hand back the phone so Lucy says, her voice quiet and calm, “Do you want company?”

Alex nods, but leans back when Maggie moves closer. “Not yet.”

Maggie shuffles over to Lucy. Alex is big on intimacy. All three of them are, soft touches in passing, kissing palms or foreheads, holding hands and blocking the pavement. Alex loves when they’re curled up on the sofa, or cradled in one another’s arms. But in the moments after a panic attack, sounds and smells and touches don’t make sense. Maggie’s hand on her shoulder feels like a falling building, Lucy’s lips on her cheek a wildfire.

So Maggie leans her shoulder against Lucy’s, take her hand and squeezes gently as Alex gathers the hoodie around her. They sit quietly, Lucy drops her head to Maggie’s shoulder. They play with each other’s fingers and slowly, Alex’s white knuckle grip on the edges of her hoodie loosens.

“Can you help me up?” She asks.

Lucy and Maggie scoot over to her, let Alex rest her hands on their shoulders and push herself up off the floor. She holds her hands out and they each take one, and Alex helps them up.

“My legs are sore.”

“Want to sit on the couch?” Lucy asks.

Alex nods, and they wander over to the worn leather couch, the one with the seat cushions that feel like clouds. Alex is still shaking; she won’t stop for a while, even with her breathing returned to normal and the world around her starting to make a little more sense.

Her girlfriends sit with her, waiting for her to relax into them before touching, running soft fingertips down her arm, counting the knuckles of her fingers until she’s ready to stand up and carry on. Like they always do, and they always will.


End file.
